- Pirate:
- (v., n.) to steal software, or one who is such a thief. True pirates
see nothing wrong with thievery, having successfully forgotten or repressed
all moral values.
- Pop:
- (v.) to remove from an area of memory naively thought to be the stack in
a futile attempt to keep a program running.
- Portable:
- (adj.) that which can be physically moved more than a hundred yards
by an unaided olympic athlete without permanent damage to that individual
more than 50% of the time.
- Printer:
- (n.) a small box attached to a computer and used to start fires in
cold weather.
- Procedure:
- (n.) a method of performing a program sub-task in an inefficient
way by extensively using the stack instead of a GOTO.
See: Pascal and C.
- Processor:
- (n.) a device for converting sense to nonsense at the speed of
electricity, or (rarely) the reverse.
- Program:
- (n.) that which manipulates symbols rapidly with unforseen results.
Also: a bug's way of perpetuating bugs.
- Programmer:
- (n.) 1. one who writes programs and trusts them. An optimist.
2.
Any employee who needs neither food nor sleep but exists on large
quantities of caffeine, nicotine, sucrose, and machine-vended preservatives
thinly disguised as foodstuffs.
- Programming Language:
- (n.) a shorthand way of describing a series of bugs to
a computer or a programmer.
- Prompt:
- (n.) a computer request for a random operator error. Also a game
where the computer plays the part of Vanna White and the operator, a
contestant. There are no prizes for winning.
- Push:
- (v.) to put into an area of memory believed to be the stack for the
ostensible purpose of later retrieval.
Tonkin's rule: In any program there
are always more 'pushes' than 'pops.' See: Recursion.
- Quantum leap:
- (adj.) literally, to move by the smallest amount theoretically
possible. In advertising, to move by the largest leap imaginable (in the
mind of the advertiser). There is no contradiction.
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